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Friday, April 30, 2010

CONVICTED & SURRENDERED "Raising kids is like a recipe, you get what you throw in the mix!"

Rated R - do not let your children read this!

Hello Again, (no time to edit so I don't wanna hear about type errors, I know they are there!) LOL

I hope this day finds you doing well & enjoying the gorgeous weather! The topic today is homeschooling & raising children :) Chances are, you will not agree with this article... and that's okay. I don't care. That is the beauty of us all on our own paths, we are all struggling for our own truths in our lives. What I hope you get out of it is an ounce of conviction and a pound of surrender equalling a better you loving your kids.

This is a VERY hot topic if you get any group of women together, it is almost as hot of a topic as stay at home moms verses working moms. Why? Because a lot of toes and pride quickly gets stepped on. (And you have to ask yourself why? Why would someone's PRIDE be stepped on about NOT being a full time parent? They will pick on that word, FULL TIME, parent... they will disect this topic a hundred different ways. Everyone wants to be considered full time no matter if they only spend 5 hrs a day with their kids while other moms spend 24 hours a day. Though if we were speaking of a job outside the home, anything under 40 hours would be considered part-time!) Hmmmmm?

The facts are in and across the board home school kids are scoring higher than their public school peers. That and the facts that they do not have to compete for attention and get all the one on one they need, starts to tip the scale. Then old argument, no matter how ignorant it was, that homeschool kids couldn't possibly get as socialized as public school kids is like saying you aren't socialized. I actually laugh about this one because you see, I can see this topic from both perspectives because one of my children is public schooled and five are home schooled. And I would choose how my home school kids are socialized 100 times over how my public school child is socialized. It's the difference between night and day. And I chose the light!

I have seen the affects of public school and it is horrible. I've seen the good the bad and the ugly and public schools are not a place for thriving kids. This old argument is now one of the past as cities recreation departments and churches are rising up and offering the home school kids football, baseball, soccer, theater, drama, cheerleading, arts,activities and teams! So if the home school kids are now involved in more extra-curricular activities than their peers, scoring higher in nationwide testing and usually expressing a more calm demeanor along with respect, love for God, love of country, and family... the public schools are obviously on the losing side now and so people are in a tiff.

It's just like the argument of whether we should ship the kids off to daycare or raise them ourselves? I'm sorry folks, I think this one is a no brainer. Actually I think all these topics are no brainers but I can say that because I've been through the fire and I've lived the good the bad and the ugly with experiences from one extreme to the other. I was the popular one in school, the head cheerleader, the homecoming queen, the good student in public school and guess what? I still hated it and if I was treated the way some people were treated I might have snapped and grab a gun like some of these so called troubled teens have. I'm no better than anyone on this planet but the difference between me and a lot of folks is that I have completely surrendered to God.

So what does that mean? That means that I get it, I get it that I am nothing without God. I see the mistakes I have made. Does it hurt my pride? OH YES but it isn't about me anymore, it is about my Lord and Savior. My old pride is now used to shape me into the woman God wants me to become. If that means he has convicted my heart enough to make it clear to me that I have to suck it up and actually teach my own children, then so be it. If it means I have to straighten up my life and be a reflection of how I want them to become, so be it. If it means I have to raise my children and not just HOPE that a stranger will do it as good as I can, so be it. If it means I have to get off my butt - turn off the t.v. and be a parent, so be it! If it means I will surrender to God of how many children I will have and the life style we will lead, so be it. I COMPLETELY surrender my everything to God: my money, my children, my husband, my life.

So when these topics of daycare verses mom and dad's raising their kids and home school verses public school, the list goes on and on. Come on folks, that voice in the back of your head or in your heart, that's God telling you what is right and what is not. Can kids survive public school, obviously but should kids be exposed to sex of all kinds, horrible language, sexual harrassment, drugs, alcohol... it is a sewer and I see that clearly. If you don't then don't yell at me that I smell the odor and you don't, it doesn't mean the stink AIN'T THERE>

I personally have taught in the public schools and have seen the ugly for myself. Does that mean all the teachers are horrible NO!!! Lots of fantastic wonderful teachers are in the mix - but so are the horrible ones! The ones that treat your children differently behind closed doors when the parents aren't around. I've seen this first hand. I've seen the opposite as well where the parent that I had to turn a child over to, at the end of the day, was NOT fit to take care of the child. That too broke my heart. SO I DO SEE THINGS BOTH WAYS. But if the parent is competent and loving, they should be teaching and caring for their own children.

You may say, well what about single parents. Well, communities and families should take care of those who say they HAVE TO WORK. The communities and families should take care of those women/men just as they take care of the orphans and widows just as the Bible instructs us to do. Because raising the kids is the most important role we have.

I've seen the ugly side of schools & life...I've been molested and even raped my senior year. I've seen my own child get off the school bus shaking after hearing older boys talk about what they were going to do to a girl, in detail, of how they were going to TAKE her. I've heard first hand of my children getting yelled at by faculty for praying before they eat. I've heard first hand of how severe bullying goes to the extreme and when a child FINALLY defends himself, he is the one to get in trouble. I've seen the parents who mean well. I've seen the parents who use the schools as a glorified daycare. I've seen the good parents agonize over whether to keep their kids in the public schools or not. I've seen the parents fight over which is better. I've been those parents. I've been in that fire and I'm glad I found the light.

Are all parents in the place I am in and can see everything I have seen, no, and I get that. We will not all agree but let's raise our kids and be plugged in to what in the world is going on and take our parental blinders off!! We can no longer HOPE everything is okay or say well our school is different. NO it is NOT. Kids are kids and they are mean when left to fend for themselves. Without parental guidance they will run wild period and they will prey on the other kids at school. Buses for one, if people have to use them, should have at least 3 adults on to control the behaviors which are flat out crude! I've witnessed 4th graders using four letter words and worse, older students talking filthy infront of the kindergarteners and upper high schoolers having oral sex on the bus!

Home Schooling has been around thousands of years and most of our ancestors were upstanding wonderful people. Public schools have only been around a short time in the whole history time-line. No where else in our culture do we herd people together segregating them in age groups and hoping they will turn out okay. When was the last time all the 35 yr olds were herded together and told they have to all be taught the same thing every day or they aren't socialized? That would be insane and so is this topic. It isn't a topic it is a choice of whether you are going to raise your own kids. It is a choice of whether or not you are going to teach your children in the way they should go. One public school teacher in junior high told me,"If the parents knew half of what goes on behind closed doors they would never let their children attend our school." G.W.


I don't want to hear how great your kids are doing in public school, I don't want to hear about how perfect your decisions are, I know the truth, I've been there and done that and would never do it again. I know what God tells me in my heart. I will continue to live by what he leads me to do. I'm not here to make anyone happy, I'm here to do my job and not pass the buck.

So no matter what you do, or how you raise your kids... "Raising kids is like a recipe, the outcome is what you throw into the mix!"

I'm tired of explaining myself. Tired of explaining why I teach my children. When did teaching our children become NOT the norm? I don't come into your lives and question why you ship off your kids every day. Don't ask me why mine stay at home being taught with love, respect, compassion, and knowledge! So raise your children however you wish but with love and passion but quit asking us home school moms why we teach our own children! That's like asking you why you love yours!